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Clean up any distracting clutter, shut off your phone, and remove anything else that might make you feel nervous or keep you from focusing on your partner.

Dim lighting, soft music, and a warm room temperature can help make you feel safe and comfortable. Consider taking some time to groom yourself beforehand so that you feel relaxed and confident.

Get consent. Make sure you and your partner have openly agreed to have sex. If you're not sure how your partner is feeling, ask before going forward.

Just because your partner doesn't say "no," it doesn't mean you have consent. If you do not want sex, they should back off when you say no.

Use condoms. Condoms protect against both pregnancy and sexually-transmitted infections STIs. Using protection may help you relax if you are nervous about getting pregnant or a disease.

Other forms of birth control do not protect against STIs, so a condom gives you an extra layer of protection. If your partner refuses to use a condom, you may want to reconsider having sex with them.

There are both male and female condoms available. The most important thing about condoms is that they fit. Partners should buy a few different types of condoms.

Try them on and see what fits best. If your partner has a latex allergy, nitrile condoms are a great alternative. Condoms should be worn before, during, and after penetration.

This will increase your protection against STIs and pregnancy. Apply lubricant. Lubricant will ease a lot of the pain by reducing friction.

It can also help prevent condoms from breaking during sex. Apply lubricant to your partner's penis over the condom or sex toy before they penetrate you.

If you're using latex condoms, do not use an oil-based lubricant. These can weaken the latex and cause the condom to tear or break.

Instead, use a silicone- or water-based lube. It is safe to use any type of lube with a nitrile or polyurethane condom. Take your time. Try to enjoy the moment instead of rushing to the finish line.

Spend time figuring out what you and your partner both enjoy. Start with kissing, move to making out, and stick to whatever pace feels most comfortable for both of you.

Foreplay can help you relax while increasing arousal. It can also increase your natural lubrication, making it easier for your partner to enter you painlessly.

Remember that you can stop having sex at any point. Consent is active and ongoing. You have the right to stop or withdraw consent at any point you want.

Communicate your needs. Don't be afraid to ask for what you need in the moment. If something feels good, let your partner know. If something is causing you pain or discomfort, tell them.

They should be willing to do what it takes to make you feel pleasure instead of pain. For example, if you are on top of your partner, you can better control the speed and angle of penetration.

Do some aftercare. If you have pain or bleeding, deal with it before it becomes too overbearing. Take an over-the-counter pain reliever, clean up any blood, and wear a light pad for a few hours.

If you experience extreme pain, you need to talk to a trusted adult or see a health care provider. Laura Marusinec, MD. You may not really be ready to have sex yet, or you may be scared.

Think about if you are ready to have sex. Are you mature enough? Are you feeling pressured to have sex? Do you really care about your partner and does he treat you well and really care about you?

If you don't think you are ready yet, talk to your partner and ask him to wait until you are. If you are ready and have a caring partner, then talk about why you may be scared.

If you are worried about pregnancy or diseases, make sure you use condoms and go on birth control first. If you are scared of pain, read the article for tips.

Not Helpful 61 Helpful If you are going to have sex, the best way to prevent pregnancy is to start taking the pill or Depo shot at least a month or two before you have sex, AND use a condom as well every time.

If you take the pill, you have to make sure you take it when you are supposed to each day and not miss pills. And if you do the Depo shot, you have to get it when it's due, about every 3 months.

Not Helpful 68 Helpful I'm an older teen and a virgin, and I want to lose it fast because my friends been lost theirs when they were younger than me.

What should I do? Wait until you're actually ready to have sex. Don't feel pressured to lose it because your friends did.

Not Helpful Helpful I'm really scared that his "thing" will be really big and hurt me, but I really want to do "it. Try other activities to get to know his penis.

Men with longer than average penises are uncommon, so it's likely he is of normal length. Remember, your vagina is designed to birth a tiny human being, and a penis is much smaller than a baby.

If my partner is gentle and slow, will there still be pain? If so, how long will that last? There is discomfort during first time sex, but going at it gentle and slow will indeed make it easier.

There's discomfort, because your vagina is not used to stretching to accommodate a penis yet. The more you do it, the easier it gets.

As for duration, it should not be longer than a day or so and should not be excruciating. Not Helpful 38 Helpful Discharge is a vagina's natural cleaning system.

It is normal to produce a lot since everyone is different. Not Helpful 46 Helpful Tell him that it's okay, and that you trust him.

Promise to tell him if it hurts. Some women bleed a little, some women don't. If your sexual partner thinks you have to bleed or you're not a virgin, tell them to do some research.

They don't know what they're talking about. When I have sex, I feel like I'm going to need to go to the bathroom.

Is there anything wrong with me? No, this is a common feeling. Try urinating before sex. What is happening is he's putting pressure on your G Spot which causes that feeling.

You most likely won't urinate, but it's not uncommon to leak a little, which is perfectly fine. I'm experiencing a crampy pain in my abdominal area when I have sex with my partner.

Why is this occurring? If you are having deep, penetrative sex, then he is most likely hitting your cervix. Tell him to move more gently and slowly and to not thrust as deeply to see if it improves.

Not Helpful 57 Helpful Include your email address to get a message when this question is answered. If you experience excruciating pain or heavy bleeding, see a doctor as soon as possible.

Helpful 4 Not Helpful 4. If you feel like tonight is not "the night," don't be ashamed to wait. A caring partner will value how you feel above anything else.

If you change your mind, it is okay to say so! Helpful 5 Not Helpful 0. You might get the urge to go to the toilet during sex.

This is normal. Urinating before sex can alleviate this sensation. If you still experience this with an empty bladder, you may be someone who can experience female ejaculation.

Helpful 8 Not Helpful 2. Helpful 7 Not Helpful 1. Make an appointment with a health clinic or gynecologist before you become sexually active.

They will provide different birth control methods, teach you about STIs, and even give you condoms. Helpful 2 Not Helpful 2. Always use a water based lubricant, not Vaseline, oil, moisturizer, or any kind of greasy substance.

Oil-based lubricants can damage latex based condoms and cause irritation and pain, or a vaginal or yeast infection.

Helpful 1 Not Helpful 0. No one's first time is absolutely perfect, so leave your expectations at the door. Helpful 4 Not Helpful 0. Use a condom even if you have another form of birth control.

Hormonal birth control like the pill only prevents pregnancy, not STIs. You can get an STI your first time. If you feel you are nervous, practicing foreplay is a good way to make you more comfortable with someone touching you.

It can make you more comfortable and confident with what you are doing. Helpful 4 Not Helpful 1. Don't give in to pressure from your partner.

It's your decision, not anyone else's. Helpful 76 Not Helpful Don't drink or take any kind of drug out of fear of pain.

It could make it much worse. Helpful 62 Not Helpful If your partner has had multiple partners, you should ask them to get tested for STIs.

STIs are spread through vaginal, anal, and oral sex. People can carry and pass on STIs without showing symptoms. You can decrease your chances of getting an STD by using condoms, dental dams, and other barrier methods.

Helpful 53 Not Helpful If you take birth control pills and are taking other medications such as antibiotics, this can sometimes alter the effects of the pill.

Always consult your doctor before starting any medications to see if there will be any negative interactions with your birth control.

Helpful 42 Not Helpful It is possible to get pregnant the first time you have sex. Condoms are highly effective when used correctly, but if possible, you should use another form of birth control along with a condom.

Helpful 45 Not Helpful Related wikiHows. About This Article. Co-authored by:. Co-authors: Updated: August 1, Categories: Virginity.

Article Summary X The pain from losing your virginity is a scary thought,but there are steps you can take to make your first time a more comfortable, and even enjoyable experience.

Deutsch: Verliere deine Jungfräulichkeit ohne Schmerzen. Nederlands: Je maagdelijkheid verliezen zonder pijn voor meiden.

Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 17,, times. But after reading this, I am not going to rush straight into it with someone I don't love.

Rated this article:. Jenny Huang Jul 15, I am undergoing a very confused time. This passage taught me a lot. Sex seems so wonderful. Now I think I'm more prepared than before.

In China, we don't get this kind of sex education. All we got was two drawn pictures and I still didn't understand!

Hope you guys can keep going on and tell us more about our body and sex. Okoli Pjewel Nov 20, Help us delete comments that do not follow these guidelines by marking them offensive.

Let's work together to keep the conversation civil. Losing virginity is a huge issue, especially in a country like ours.

After your first sexual intercourse, you may have plenty of concerns about your body. Here are some of them:. Since the vagina is still getting used to this new activity you have introduced to your body, it takes some time for the vagina to become used to penetration.

However, this gets better with time. Even how your vagina lubricates itself will change over a period of time. After some time, your body will become used to sex and every time you arouse, your otherwise inactive clitoris and uterus will go through these transformations and return to normal post the act.

But, this goes back to normal post sex and is only a temporal state. Vasocongestion is actually is the swelling of bodily tissues which is caused by increased vascular blood flow which leads to breast, nipples, labia and clitoris becoming enlarged.

During this sexual arousal, well-oxygenated blood is supplied to your genitals and breasts. As a result, the outer lips, inner lips and clitoris may begin to swell and your heart rate and blood pressure may also increase momentarily.

Yes, you read that right. This is actually one of the hidden yet truly amazing benefits of losing your virginity. When you have sex for the very first time, it may have a direct impact on the glow on your face-- especially if the act finished with an orgasm.

The logic is simple, when you have sex, it improves your blood circulation, which helps in pumping oxygen to your skin, giving it that heavenly, youthful glow.

Also, when you have sex, your brain releases happy hormones like Serotonin and Oxycontin, which help in cutting down the stress levels and make you feel relaxed.

The result? You get clearer-looking skin with a lit-from-within glow. The blood circulation around your nipples increases and the muscular tension increases making them tender than usual.

As a result, the feel-good hormone of your body, serotonin, gets secreted. Other than this, when you orgasm, it releases another hormone known as oxytocin, which makes you feel happy and relaxed.

Fret not, this is not a pregnancy alarm but rather your body's way of telling you that its going through changes. This is due to the hormonal changes and can make you feel extremes of either of the emotions.

Remember, everyone's first time is a different experience, but it is important to use protection to prevent pregnancy and STDs. When you have sex for the first time, it may hurt or feel uncomfortable, due to the lack of lubrication, owing to the friction.

If sex continues to be painful for you, you can either try different angles or positions to reduce the discomfort and ask your partner to go slow when it comes to penetration.

Always seek an expert advice if sex continues to remain painful. Please Click Here to subscribe other newsletters that may interest you, and you'll always find stories you want to read in your inbox.

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